[redacted] has tons of friends who are girls. actually, he is himself obsessed with girls and constantly thinking about them. he thinks about them more than anyone i’ve ever known — including you.

— Mihir. Well Mihir, I’ll take that as a diss because, as you know, what I do I like to do well, including thinking obsessively about girlz. But I’m just glad to be in the running, and in your frame of mind as you ruminate deeply on these weighty issues. I’m happy to be here, and that’s worth a thousand recognitions as the world’s most ponderous girl-crazy loser.